I'll See You Again
by Yami Y666
Summary: [EDITED] Jou's thoughts as he realizes that he and his sister aren't going to see each other again for quite some time. Takes place BEFORE the animanga. [slice of life. No pairings]


**Important Note:** It's written from Joey's point of view. This takes place just after Joey realizes that his and Serenity's parents are splitting up and they're not going to see each other again for quite some time. Oh, and this takes place BEFORE the ani-manga. Also rated for language.

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**I'll See You Again  
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_"It was us who started, and us who will finish."_

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- 06:22 PM - 

I stormed out of the room, seeing nothing but my feet pounding down on the ground in front of me. It didn't even occur to me to try to keep it down for the neighbor downstairs, that old man with the annoying habit of pounding under my floor when I turned up the music too high.

No, all I was doing was trying to resist the urge to smash my fist into the nearest wall.

I vaguely recall seeing my sister sit down at the piano and go through her ritual of preparing to play before she dissappeared from my view as I turned the corner.

Maybe I should have payed more attention. As I sat in my room, fuming over the injustice of it all, the haunting melody of her current piece floated upstairs and easily passed through my door. I cursed my ability to overlook her; I'd long ago realized that her music had a haunting way of reaching deep into my soul and plucking something there.

Maybe it was the bond we shared, being siblings, I dunno.

But I wanted to scream, to yell, to plead, to beg. _Anything_ would have been better than the state I suddenly found myself slipping into. Not for the first time, I bitterly realized that things did not go my way and I sat there, an expression of blank placidness on my face as my sanity whittled itself away underneath.

- 09:47 PM -

When the last echoes of the torturing piano notes left my head, I heard her shuffling as she carefully placed her sheet music back in its folder, closed the lid over the piano, and moved the chair back under it...All with that slow agonizing monotone that had overcome her, these past couple of days.

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks and I know what I should have known before; she had been hiding this fact from me, trying to keep my pain at bay. Oh, sister, don't you know that it's useless trying to prevent the inevitable?

Why must my sister live with such a sense of righteousness and thoughts that tended to be self-sacrificing? And why does she continue to shoulder the burden that should be mine alone?

Dammit! Why doesn't anything ever work the way it's supposed to around here?

Sliding sideways off the bed, I fell to the floor. From another's point of view, I suppose I looked comical; zero expression on my face and boneless, sliding limbs. What a sight.

So that's how she found me, hours later, staring up at the ceiling and contemplating moving myself back on the bed. That night seemed dim and dark, so hard to make out the broken pieces I can remember.

I wonder if she can recall it better than me, or is it a haze like mine?

In hindsight, I think that's how it's supposed to be; If I could remember, then it would've been that much harder to leave. I think that was one of the hardest lessons I ever learned: Don't look back.

As it was, I didn't sleep that night. Nor the next one. I think my mind wouldn't let me, too filled up with unnamed emotions and thoughts. I still don't know how to make head or tail of it.

- 03:52 AM -

Somewhere in the quieter hours of the morning, when all I could hear outside was the distant squeal of a car tire and the slamming of some door, I was still awake, still lying on the same wooden floor of my room. While I had regained the use of my body some time before, I couldn't summon the will. It was ironic really, I needed to get away but couldn't force myself to get up.

Pathetic.

Nearby, Serenity slept fitfully, her usually radiant face scrunched up in worry and pain, even in her sleep. It wasn't fair, we both knew that, but how to combat it?

It was only after hours of thought going down the same path over and over, after hours of lying on that floor, and after hours of cursing everything around me into the darkest pits of hell, did I realize that there _was_ no way to get around it. 

The fact remained: me and my sister _would_ be separated. And only after even _more_ thought did I come to the conclusion that it was up to us to meet back together, no matter the time, distance, or effort needed.

I cracked a grin, the first one in a while, in the darkness of my room. I marveled at the path my mind seemed to take, all on its own.

I'd gone from feeling furiously angry to numb to cold. What started out as blind fury on my part, me just wanting to rip everything within reach into tiny shreds, had steadily turned into just blank shock, consuming and overpowering. So predictable, now that I think about it; Human behavior is truly remarkable, is it not?

The long hours I spent in my room alone that day, with only my thoughts and memories to hold onto, it had done something to me as well. I felt different now somehow, like my room had suddenly spun faster through time. I felt older, more worn...And the weight on my shoulders had grown heavier. Strangely, I accepted it without question.

The damned cycle was complete, coming back to where it had started. From anger to denial, from doubt to acceptance. I think I can safely say now, "Been there, done that, got the t-shirt" and get away with it. Though somehow, that remark doesn't amuse me as much as I thought it would.

Oh sister, someday, I knew we'd see each other again, even if I had to row a boat across the whole damned ocean to see you. You mean the world to me, don't you ever forget that.

I rolled over on my side then, and watched through my window as the first rays of sun slanted through the curtains and fell on my empty and unused bed.

You are my sister, and I am your brother. We share a bond, we have a link: We have a common point of origin. No matter what, no matter how the storm may rage over our calm sea, no matter how high the mountain we have to climb over, and no matter how far apart we seem to be...Don't you ever forget me, don't you even try.

What is life, if you have to travel through it alone? An empty shell, a husk, a vacant space. I know that now, we were meant to know how precious what we have is.

Look in your heart, and find me. I'll always be here, always with you.

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**A/N**

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Just a short break from my other fanfics! See, I'm getting back to them now! Going, going...gone! D

Ok, This short ol' oneshot was inspired by one of my silent musings that seem to happen without warning and hold up my attention at gun-point. Joey turned out sounding somewhat older than I imagined he would be but it works out better this way because it's easier to connect with him.


End file.
